How Do We Use Social Networks to Shape or Define Our Identity?

I don't really use SNS--certainly not the way my children do.  I have a Facebook account but only so I can monitor my son's usage of Facebook and I do that very seldom.  For some reason, I associate SNS with writing on bathroom walls in high school or passing notes in class.  I never wrote on desks or bathroom walls because I was always afraid someone would write SUCKS! after my name.  (A very common and unwanted remark in 1980s American high schools).  I didn't pass notes in class because I was afraid the teacher would catch me and read it aloud to the class (like one teacher did to my best friend who just happened to be writing the note not to me but ABOUT me).

I am a fairly guarded and private person with people I don't know extremely well. When I see my children or my neighbors or my siblings with hundreds of "friends" on their pages, I question the authenticity of those friendships. I am certain I have 400+ acquaintances, but I certainly do not have 400+ people I would like to share my thoughts and daily activities with.  My twenty year old daughter, however, does share more than I feel comfortable with her sharing with her many "friends"on a daily basis.  Boyd (2007) believes this online community that my children participate in is a necessity for them--that teenagers time is so regulated and their freedom so limited that SNS allow them the freedom to learn how to interact with society at large.  I see how this potential for interaction and building identities is important for adolescents and young adults.  I just don't feel this same need at this point in my own life.

There is so much of Web 2.0 that I find useful.  Wikis are a great way to collaborate.  Social bookmarking makes many of my searches much easier.  Blogs make sharing news or projects with others extremely easy.  I know that social networking is supposed to make keeping in touch with others easy, but I just don't see the point.  I can keep in touch with friends and family through private blogs, such as Shutterfly, that allow me to post comments and photos of my family and is very controlled in who is allowed to view it. Perhaps it's my age.  At 46, I feel my identity is very defined.  I am not concerned with approval or acceptance of others.  I don't want to post my daily activities for everyone to read like a designer label of activities to one-up everyone.  Boyd states that "social voyeurism passes time while providing insight into society at large."  I find most social networking sites akin to social voyeurism.

I guess when it comes to social networking I am clearly defined as a Digital Immigrant.

References:

boyd, danah. (2007) “Why Youth (Heart) Social Network Sites: The Role of Networked Publics in Teenage Social Life.” MacArthur Foundation Series on Digital Learning – Youth, Identity, and Digital Media Volume (ed. David Buckingham). Cambridge, MA: MIT Press.